Friday, December 14, 2012

Sandy Hook

There isn't a whole lot you can say when someone has such a break with reality that they decide it's a good idea to shoot up an elementary school.  I have no solutions other than to wonder if the huge amount of media coverage of these type of events simply fuels more events just like it.  I have no doubt someone, somewhere, if not most of these people, begin their ideation of a mass shooting because they see one on TV.

So rather than focus on the shooting itself, I'd like to focus on an issue that I've spent most of the last year struggling with.  That's loss of control.  When innocent people, and especially children, are caught up in such a horrible situation, I think most of us feel a loss of control.  Everyone starts talking about fixing that, about gaining control to prevent it from ever happening again.  It's scary to admit that we don't have the control to do that.  We may be able to reduce the risk, but we can't prevent it.

Since the beginning of time, people, including children, have met violent ends at the hands of other people who had a serious disruption in their brain preventing them from acting rationally.  Other times people suddenly and unexpectedly die from injury or illness.  We can't stop that.

What we can do is appreciate the time we have and honor the fact that we don't know when that time is going to end.

We're all going to have bad days where we're frustrated with the kids and counting the minutes to bedtime.  That's normal and that's okay and we shouldn't feel bad about it.  But make a concerted effort to recharge your batteries and get back to showing your love to friends and family when you can.  We can't prevent all tragedies.  We can live our lives in such a way that we won't have to wish we'd given more hugs or said more I love yous. 

As I tried to get across last January, do what you can to see your life for what it is, to count your blessings.  Tomorrow is not a guarantee, if the walls crashed down tonight, what regrets would you have?  Go get rid of those regrets now while you have a chance.

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